Miserable

The misery is endless. Sleep doesn't help because I can't control the nightmares. Hard to believe it has only been 75 hours. Seems like forever. I want time to fly by because maybe in a few years it will get better.

I walk around the house in circles, accomplishing nothing. I don't want to do anything or go anywhere. When I force myself to leave the house it still doesn't help. The little food that I eat has no taste. I don't know what to do with myself.

Tomorrow I'm going to call my doctors and demand some medication. I'd call their emergency service tonight but any doctor who doesn't know me will likely admit me to Pine Rest--which is probably where I belong right now anyhow.........................